Moving Day

This is what the 13th move looks like:

 

Piper stuck in a corner with the one toy I didn’t pack, the box that toy will soon be packed in, rolls of toilet paper, and a snack. Oh, and Piper’s backpack. She’ll need that Monday morning. Even if I can’t find clean clothes by then, Piper and Sissy are going to school. Don’t worry: it’s the same school. They’ll have their backpacks. And I shoved their lunchboxes inside, too, so I don’t have to unpack every box in the kitchen looking for water bottles and plastic lids Monday morning. This is what you learn from 13 moves.

It’s true that I stuck Piper in a kitchen corner out of the way of the movers. She wouldn’t have been much help under our feet lugging antique dressers up and down four flights of stairs. She showed her true colors when I asked her to pack her toys. It took her three hours to pack one box. Two hours and 59 minutes to play with the toys. One minute to toss them all in after I yelled “Are you done packing that box yet?” from the other room.

But after the packing and the moving, there was the cleaning. Piper can help with cleaning. Sissy tackled the fridge. It was her first fridge to scrub. It almost brought a tear to my neurotic Virgo eye. Sniff. I handed Piper a broom. What harm could she do? The house was empty except for the 468 miniature plastic toy bits just waiting for me to step on them.

“And what do I do with this?” Piper asked, glaring at the broom I’d put in her hands.

“You sweep. See all those toy parts? Sweep them up,” I said.

“Mom,” she said, rolling her eyes, “I wasn’t born to sweep.”

Soup for You

Yesterday was moving day (more on that later). In a frantic rush to clean out both my fridge and pantry, I made soup. I chopped up every single vegetable (3 carrots, 1 onion, 4 parsnips, 3 stalks of celery, 1 yellow pepper, and a handful of snap peas) and threw in as many cans of kidney beans and chopped tomatoes as the pot would hold. The cookbooks were packed so I made it up as I went.

Piper wanted to help, so I let her sprinkle in cumin, chipotle, oregano, and basil. Turns out, I was making chili. I found a can of warm beer in the back of a closet so beer bread became a side dish for the chili. Piper stirred and sniffed and tasted. She added more pepper. She said it needed salt and honey. She asked if we could shred the rest of the cheddar block to top the bowls of chili. She’s brilliant like that.

And we ate chili and hunks of fresh beer bread slathered with the last pats of butter. The movers had taken our chairs and table so we sat on the empty dining room floor. It was the best soup I’ve ever tasted. Piper has the touch.

This morning we woke up in our new house in a maze of boxes. I found 3 bowls but we couldn’t find spoons. We have cereal but the milk is still at the other house. We drank our orange juice from crystal goblets. “What do you want for breakfast, Piper? I found bagels. Or you can have dried cereal without the milk. And I have one pear.”

“Soup,” Piper said. “I want chili.”

“I can’t find the spoons.”

“I’ll use chips. Or beer bread. Or both. Yummy!”

So Piper had soup for breakfast. She wants it again for lunch. It’s becoming her thing. There are worst things. If it were up to Piper, there would always be soup for you.

Unplugged

We’re going to take a little break over at piperism for a few days. There are boxes to pack and there are friends to see and there is Thanksgiving food to be eaten. Hope you and yours have a restful holiday together. We’ll see you on the other side with even more funnies from the Piper, I’m sure. I’ll leave you with a turkey of thanks made by Piper. By the way, we don’t have a dog. She’s just thankful for dog.

Hide ‘n Seek

We’re moving in three days so we’re living among boxes. The toys are packed but that hasn’t stopped the Piper from inventing new games to play. She’s even found a favorite new place to hide.

 

If you knock three times and sing “Feliz Navidad,” she’ll open the door and let you in. Piper calls it the “I’m hiding in the kitchen cabinet ‘cuz it’s empty game.” Catchy, isn’t?

Sign Language

“Daddy taught me some sign language?” Piper said. “Want to see?”

“Of course,” I answered.

“This means beautiful.” Piper swiped her hand over her face.

“Nice.”

“And this means poop.” She stuck her thumb into her fist.

“Uh huh.”

“This is fart.” Piper wiggled her fingers beneath the sign for poop.

“Impressive. Nice work, Daddy.”

“Want to see the sign for picking your nose?” She stuck her finger up a nostril.

“That’s not a sign, Piper. You’re just picking your nose. Stop.”

“But you read the sign! It worked! See? Told you I know sign language.”

The Show Must Go On

Do you remember your childhood puke pot? You know the one. You can’t hang out in the bathroom all day when you’re sick, so your mom or dad would make you lug around the puke pot just in case. They pushed it in your direction every single time you coughed. Just in case. Our family’s was a cast iron pot with a broken handle. You had to carry one size by the exposed screw. We all remember it fondly. Yesterday, Piper earned her very first puke pot.

It’s a bit too upscale for its purpose if you ask me. It’s my favorite stock pot from William Sonoma. My stews will probably never taste the same. I offered a plastic cleaning bucket, but Piper had an opinion about that. “It smells! I’m not going near that thing!” As if what she was planning on doing in it was going to smell like roses. Eww.

So everywhere Piper went, her puke pot did too. Luckily, after a few doses of antibiotics, it didn’t get much action. I knew Piper was feeling better when the puke pot got turned upside down into a stage for the My Little Pony show. Normally I dread these performances, but I was so relieved to see some energy back in the Piper and a tiny smile that I cheered Buttercup and Twinkle Toes on. And they made it through the entire show before Piper had to borrow back their stage. It was a grand finale I’ll never forget.

Piper Writes a Sentence

I’ve blogged before about Piper’s loathing of all things academic. She’s the daughter of two professors. One of us has been in graduate school most of her life. Of course she hates reading and writing. Makes total sense.

But last week Piper’s teacher presented me with her very first sentence. Ta da!

 

Now I know your kindergartener wrote her first novel last year, but Piper isn’t your kindergartner. Piper wrote about shopping. “I went to Macy’s.” Which is true, in her defense. Specifically, I took her to Claire’s. In the picture she drew headbands with sparkly bows and huge flowers. Those were her big purchase. She’s worn one of those headbands every day since. She loves a sparkly headband. She loves a sparkly anything. I praised her sentence, of course. I went ga ga over the thing. Piper glowed. Then she announced “Tomorrow I’m writing about my news boots!” Which are also pretty fabulous. Just like Piper.

Morning, Sunshine

Piper likes to paint the sun in all of her pictures.

Sometimes her pictures have multiple suns.  They’re always bright yellow with lots of rays. Sometimes the suns hang out on the ground and sometimes they do their business in the sky with the clouds and birds. You never know where a sun will appear.

“I drew this sun for you!” Piper said, peeling off another sun, flower, sky picture from her easel.

“I love the sun! Yellow is my favorite color.” I admired the painting.

“The sun always makes me think of you, Mommy.”

“Really?” I asked. I’ve been called lots of things. Sunny has never been one of them.

“Yep,” Piper nodded. “Because you wake everyone in our house up, too. Just like the sun. Whether we want you to or not.”

 

Morning Exams

Morning snuggles often catch me off guard. I’m half asleep. I stayed up too late grading essays. I haven’t had coffee. Piper’s brain, however, has been churning. She’s ready for heavy stuff.

“Mom, do you believe in God?”

“I do.”

“Mom, do you believe in Santa?”

“I do.”

“If you’re naughty, do they both know?”

“I don’t know.”

“If God and Santa asked if I was naughty, would you lie for me?”

“No, Piper. I wouldn’t lie for you. But you aren’t naughty.”

“I know. I was just testing you. I talk to those guys, too, you know.”