Monthly Archives: July 2012

The Case of the Missing Lalaloopsy

Posted on by
4

Alice is missing. I know. I know. It’s tough news to take. When you’ve grown as attached to a six-inch-plastic Alice and in Wonderland as we have, it breaks a Piper’s heart. As best we can discern, she went rogue somewhere between Piper’s bedroom and the front steps of our townhome. It’s a lot of ground to cover. Here is Alice in happier days. Sniff.

Lalaloopsy Mini Figure 2Pack Wacky Hatter Alice in Lalaloopsyland

We’re distraught, but we’re trying not to panic. It won’t help Alice. Keep calm and carry on. Wherever you are, Alice, we won’t rest until we find you.

Until then, the game must go on. I mean, once you’ve covered every inch of the living room space with “Lalaloopsy Land” and you’re gearing up to play the make-believe game of the century, you can’t let a thing like a missing Alice stop you. Sissy to the rescue!

I’m not saying that a one-dimensional Alice on high-quality printer paper cut down to size can take the place of the real thing. I’m saying that when a Piper is crying, desperate times call for desperate measures. Sissy solved the immediate problem, if not the case.

So, until Alice climbs out of the rabbit hole and returns to reality, we’ll be waiting. Happily.

Who Took the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Posted on by
4

Who me? Couldn’t be. Then who? Piper took the cookie from the cookie jar. Are you singing along yet? Sorry ’bout that.

I caught Piper tonight between her fourth and fifth giant chocolate cookie. We were at a friend’s house and her mother-in-law made homemade treats second only to Mrs. Peterman’s. They were gooey and soft in the middle with the perfect buttery crisp edges. You know the ones. Can’t say that I blame the Piper.

Why didn’t I stop her from her chocolate chip cookie gorge? I was on the front porch stuffing down an enormous piece of strawberry rhubarb pie made by some Christian women who clearly just earned their passage through the pearly gates. Mmm.  Delicious. When I came in to refill clean up my plate, I found Piper smeared in chocolate from mouth to elbow. She smiled so big. That’s how I knew there was trouble.

“How many you had there, sweet stuff?” I asked.

“They’re small,” Piper answered, avoiding my question.

“They look big to me. Is that your second or your third?”

“How many’s a lot, Mom?” Ah. Answering a question with a question. Well played, P.

“Well,” I said, taking the current cookie contender out of her hand, “what do you think is a reasonable serving?”

“Of what?” Piper asked. Oh, please. I’m so on to you.

“Cookies, Piper. How many cookies do you think is an acceptable number?”

“Five isn’t a lot, is it? You said I could hardly buy anything with five dollars. That’s a small number.”

“Not in cookies, honey. Five cookies is too much. How many have you had?”

Piper looked at the cookie in my hand. She licked her chocolatey lips.

“Less than five,” she said. “By one. Should I switch to pie?”

Olympic Winners

Posted on by
1

We took a little trip down Piper lane tonight. It was longer than expected. Laughter fueled our ride. A good time was had by all. If you need a blast from the short past of piperism or just a quick chuckle to get you through your Olympic viewing (let’s face it-it’s serious business), here are the top viewed piperisms of all time:

Hold On. We’re Going Gaga

Raising Star Wars Girls

Soulmates

Drunk Dialing or Something Like It

Words You Didn’t Know You Needed

There you have it. The top five. The competition was tight. They all put up a good fight. If you were the judge, what piperism would take home the gold?

 

 

Let the Games Begin!

Posted on by
6

We sat down last night with our fried “chips” for the Opening Ceremonies and spoke in our worst British accents, of course. Piper had a lot of questions. Let’s face it. When it comes to the Olympics, we all do.

“I know what my Olympic sport would be,” Piper said.

“What?”

“Jumping.”

“Like pole vault jumping or ski jumping?” I asked.

“No. Like kitchen tile jumping. I can jump over three tiles before I smash my head into the wall. I’d totally win because I practice so much!”

At the very least, she’d metal.

A History Major in the Making

Posted on by
5

Sometimes Piper is anti everything. It’s part of her charm. She comes by it honestly.

Last weekend on our road trip back from the beach, we stopped off in Colonial Williamsburg for lunch. As a history major, I’ve always wanted to see it: the historic buildings, actors dressed in colonial garb, carriage rides, battlefields. So cool!

“Look at that old building! Gosh that’s old!” I said.

“I hate old,” Piper responded.

“How can you hate old? All that history!”

“I hate history.”

“Oh! Look at those people dressed up as colonisits! Can you imagine living like that?”

 

“I hate colonists.”

Bah Humbug.

Reminds me of the time my family drove to Truman’s house for a tour and I refused to get out of the car. Because I was reading Truman’s biography and couldn’t stop. It made perfect sense at the time.

 

Members Only

Posted on by
4

Piper and her cousin, Charlotte, have formed a club. You can’t join. I know. I tried.

“What do you do in your secret club?” I asked.

“Tell secrets,” Piper answered.

“Stuff,” Charlotte added.

“Can I join?”

“No.”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s secret,” Piper said.

“It’s only for members,” Charlotte explained.

“Right. I want to become a member,” I said.

Piper and Charlotte consulted. Then they ran off together squealing. Then they came back, holding hands and skipping.

“Do you have any money?” Piper asked.

“Yeah,” Charlotte said, “it costs a lot of money.”

“How much?”

Whispering ensued. “Hundreds of pennies,” Piper said.

“I have that.”

“It’s not enough,” Charlotte assured me. “You can’t afford our club.”

They’re probably right, especially when this is the view from their clubhouse window.

52 Pick Up Cards: Sissy’s Post

Posted on by
2

Back by popular demand: Sissy is guest blogging!

Everyone knows 52 card pick up: the smelly game you teach your little sibling to tease them. But I’ve never met anyone who didn’t dislike it or feel cheated by it. Except Piper.

My cousin Jack and I were setting up a card game. Piper asked if she could play. “Sure” I said. “Try 52 card pick up.”

She loved it. There were songs sung about picking the cards up and whines of wanting me to throw the cards again.

“Let’s play more 52 pick up cards!” Piper said.

“Why do you like 52 card pick up so much?” I asked

“Well, you throw the cards. Then I dance and sing while I pick them up like when I pick up my toys. Then we can play my new favorite game again!”

Looks like we’ve got ourselves a new cleaning lady.

Lions, Tigers, and Orangutans-Oh My

Posted on by
3

When you give Piper a choice of any place she’d like to go in the whole D.C. Metro area, she always picks the zoo. I’ll refrain from jokes about Piper’s own animal behavior. The zoo, it is. Off we went!

Piper’s favorite thing to do at the zoo is to pick out an animal we MUST see, locate that animal, and then the second we are in front of that animal’s cage, announce that she’s ready to see the next animal on her list. She’s not one for gazing or appreciating. For Piper, it’s all about the quest. Next, please. Bamboo eating panda? Seen it. Elephant squirting water on its back? Been there. Lion roaring and pacing in its cage? Done that.

That was, until we were eating our lunch and suddenly the monkeys, technically orangutans, found us.  “The monkeys are loose at the zoo!” Piper shouted. She pointed into the trees above our head. She was right. There they were swinging and traveling in their own orangutan style on the O Line.

“Mom,” Piper asked, “can I get up there, too?”

We decided to save that request for another day. We’ll be back soon, I’m sure.

Piper’s Picks

Posted on by
4

We’re halfway there, dear readers. I pledged 365 piperisms and we’ve made it through more than half the year. 36,000 hits. 205 posts. 761 comments. You people must be either really bored or completely enamored with the Piper. Me, too. We’re grateful.

In honor of our halfway mark, Piper and I spent some time going through the blog. She loves to laugh at herself. Isn’t that a great lesson? “I’m really funny, aren’t I?” Piper said, curled up at my side as we scrolled. Modest, too. Are you taking notes?

“Which ones are your favorites?” I asked.

Piper didn’t even hesitate. “Sissy Blogs.”

So, here you go. Piper’s picks:

Guest Blogger: Sissy

Guest Blogger: Raoul Dahl a.k.a. Sissy

Guest Blogger: Big Sister, Age 9

A Rainbow of Fruit Flavors

Thanks for reading!