Dam the Monster Update

The other night I wrote a barely coherent post at 3 a.m. regarding the invasion of monsters in our home and sleepless nights. You can read it here. I was up anyway. Might as well write.

My fabulous cousin, Margee, wrote me immediately with a remedy.  I think she felt sorry for my blubbering helplessness. I’m grateful. Margee recommended that we whip up a batch of Monster Spray which rids the house of said pests. This sounded like a perfect challenge for the Sissy. I can surely mix lavender (which monsters hate, don’t you know) with water, but Sissy said it needed to look authentic. She grabbed one of her American Girl spray bottles (by the way I didn’t know that AG girls even needed spray bottles for their hair but apparently this is another department in which I fail) and made a label. I taped it on. That was my artsy contribution. There.

Piper loved it. You’d think it was Christmas around here. She was so excited to have the Monster Spray. She sprayed the beds. All of them. In case she went wandering bed to bed in the wee hours, for which she’s famous. Then she sprayed the windows and doors. These are clear entry points for monsters. Then she sprayed her pajamas. The house smelled like a spa. We were all ready for sleep.

As I was tucking her in, Piper asked, “Is the monster spray real?”

I sort of avoided the question. “Monsters aren’t real, Piper. Remember?”

“Yeah, but I like the spray. It smells good. Let’s pretend they’re real so we can spray them.”

Then Piper slept twelve straight hours.

Margee is a genius.