Grease Lightning

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Last night we were serenaded by a local high school theater group prepping for their production of Grease. We were at our favorite diner. It’s old school decor and style with new school local organic food. Our party was six and the only table big enough for us was in front of their makeshift stage. We knew it would be noisy. Fun but noisy. But the Piper loves that kind of stuff so we sat down. Piper ordered french fries and a milkshake. Then the students began singing. Right in Piper’s ear. I thought maybe she would start belting out the music, too. I thought maybe she’d jump off her chair and dance. She didn’t. She ignored them. Completely. Coloring was much more important.

Later she asked if we could see Grease again. “You know, the summer lovin’ one, Mom,” Piper said, “not that boring ancient one.”

Rules Schmules

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Piper has a healthy disregard for most conventions. Like spelling. And pronunciation.

There is the Piper way of saying something and that’s it. You can correct her all you want. Go ahead. Waste your breath.

“Piper, it’s DARTH Vader. Not DARK Vader,” Daddy said last night as he was putting her to bed.

“That’s what I said. DARK Vader. Cuz his helmet’s black.”

“No, DARTH. With a TH.”

“Uh huh. Same thing.”

On Valentine’s Day Nana sent a care package. Piper wished us all a Happy VALENTIMES Day as she opened the box. As in, it’s TIME for Valentines.

Piper unwrapped her present and shouted, “Look! I got PELZ!”

“Those are PEZ, Piper,” Sissy corrected.

“I just love PELZ,” Piper said.

“PEZ. You love PEZ.”

“Yep. I love them both.”

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Natural Consequences

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This afternoon when I picked Piper up from school she ran into my arms, buried her face in my neck, and declared today the worst day ever. Ever is a very long time.

“What happened, P?” I asked, kissing her soft little cheek.

“It was Media Center day and I forgot my library book.”

“So they wouldn’t let you check out a new one? I’m sorry that happened to you,” I said.

Then Piper turned on me. “It’s your fault! You should have put my library book in my bag. You should remember it’s Tuesday!”

Oh, really. My sympathies began evaporating. I took a deep breath.

“It’s your library book, honey. You’re responsible for it. And if you forget it at home, then you have to wait for next Tuesday and try again. I’m sorry that you’re upset, but it’s not okay to blame me.” Whew. I didn’t even raise my voice. It probably helped that other parents were watching. Sissy, too.

“Yeah, you’re right,” Piper said, shrugging and skipping off to the car. “A girl’s got to try, you know?”

Hard Work Pays Off

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At the Grammy’s Monday night Fun won Song of the Year for “We are Young,” which Piper has claims as her very own anthem. We delivered the good news at breakfast. Piper asked about their acceptance speech. It was entirely unfair that she had to sleep through the…fun.

“They toured for 12 years,” Daddy said. “That’s a lot of hard work.”

“Wow,” Piper agreed. “That’s almost 100.”

“Well, not quite. Hard work pays off, though. It took me 12 years to achieve my biggest goal, too,” Daddy said, puffing out his chest a little at the Dr. title attached to his name. “Do you know what my big goal in life was, Piper?”

“To marry Mommy?” Piper concluded.

Paparazzi

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Piper thinks you might be following her. She knows you love the blog. You may love it so much that you’re trying to get secret pictures of her in action. Walking down the street. Sitting in the car. Dancing on the playground. You can’t get enough.

Yesterday as we were leaving school Piper saw a woman on her front porch with a camera. There was only one possible explanation.

“Ugh!” Piper exclaimed. “The paparazzi follow me everywhere!”

The F Word

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Piper told us at dinner last night that she’d heard THE “f” word. Kids at school are saying it. Her teacher is discouraging it but it seems to be contagious.

“First Kayla said it,” Piper said. “Mrs. A warned her. Kayla did it again. BIG trouble!”

“What happened then?” Sissy asked.

“Nate said it, too. Mrs. A told him not to say it again.”

“Did Mrs. A say the ‘f’ word when she told them not to say it?” Daddy asked.

“No. She didn’t have to. Everyone knows the ‘f’ word.”

“What is it, Piper?”

“Fart.”

That’s Amore More

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I cleaned out the car yesterday. Here is a list of things Sissy and Piper left in the backseat:

7 used kleenexes

12 discarded lollipop sticks

4 half eaten granola bars

245987 wrappers

2 empty water bottles

17 unidentifiable objects

and 1 note written from Sissy to Piper…

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…that made me forget the rest of the mess.